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Author Topic: Tangos Rye Bread  (Read 198 times)

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Offline Lunar

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    Lunar

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Tangos Rye Bread
« on: August 06, 2018, 10:19:47 am »
“My friend, you have met a terrible, terrible demise. But uh, y’know, I-I don't feel too bad about it. After all, if-if it weren't for me, it would’ve just been from someone else, y’know? I guess what I’m trying to say is life--life goes on. We-well, for everyone else, life goes on. Not--not for you, uh, that--that’s neither here nor there.

“Reminds me of one summer day in the park I was havin’ just a delightful picnic with my good friend Kermit, and I said to him, I said, ‘Kermit, I-I have a story.’

“He said to me, ‘what’s the significance of the story?’.

“I said to him, ‘Ke-Kermit, not every story has to have significance, y’know? Sometimes, uh, y’know, sometimes a story’s just a story. You try to read it, every little thing--find meaning in everything anyone says you’ll just drive yourself crazy. Had a friend do it once--wasn’t pretty. We talked about it for years--and then not only that, but, you’ll likely end up believing something you shouldn’t believe, thinkin’ somethin’ you shouldn’t think, o-or assuming something you shouldn’t assume, y’know? Sometimes,’ I said, ‘uh-a story is-is just a story. So just be quiet for one second of your life and each your sandwich, okay?’

“Of course, it was only then I realized I’d made sandwiches. Poor Kermit was havin’ such difficulty eatin’ ‘em. Frogs have those clumsy hands, y’know? Actually, I suppose that’s the problem--they don’t have hands at all do they? They’re-They’re all feet! I couldn’t imagine someone askin’ me to eat a sandwich with my feet.

“Now, if I recall correctly, there was a bakery nearby. I said to him, ‘Kermit, let me go get you some rye bread.’ Now, I’m unsure if Frog's enjoy rye bread, but I assure you that Kermit does.

“Now this was on a tuesday, which was good, because rye bread was always fresh on Tuesday. They made sourdough bread on Monday, and threw it out Wednesday--or rather, they sold it at a discount for people wantin’ to feed the ducks, and then probably at the end of the day finally threw it all out--I-I don’t recall.

“I do remember a man who would bring his son to the bakery every wednesday and go feed the ducks. He would buy all the sourdough bread. Of course, y’know you’re not supposed to feed the ducks sourdough bread at all. it swells up in their stomach and then they all die. At-uh-at least--at least that’s what I’ve heard. Y’know I-I never saw any ducks die myself, but I did notice a substantial decrease in the duck population over the course of a few years. I just never thought to stop the man and tell him that he was killin’ the ducks by feedin’ ‘em sourdough bread. And if you want my opinion on the matter? Heh--and I told Kermit this as well, if you wanna feed ducks, or birds of any kind for that matter, it’s best to buy seed. I mean, when you think about it, breads of any sort don’t occur in nature. They don’t grow on trees o-or spring up from the bushes. I don’t think birds know what to do with bread.

“W-what was I sayin’? Oh--oh yes, yes. So I bought Kermit some rye bread.

“What a fine day it was.”
___________________________
Idk felt like Kermit would like this
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Offline Dragonate

Re: Tangos Rye Bread
« Reply #1 on: August 06, 2018, 10:21:13 am »
my head is rolling from reading this
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+vouch

As someone very critical of admins this guy is the gold standard, by far the best admin I’ve seen on the server recently, like it’s not even close.

Offline Leddy

Re: Tangos Rye Bread
« Reply #2 on: August 06, 2018, 11:37:27 am »
Stolen from FNAF Ultinate Custom night uwu
The eyes are the window to the soul.


 

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